i’m 100% sure i can’t complete any of this except the 5k in 50 minutes at this moment in time, but it’s a cool thing to work incrementally up to. and anyway, once you’re able to do it easy, you’re prettymuch fit as we need to be.
i suggest thinking up an aquatic paddling version of this too, with maybe a skills-related kicker at the end instead of push-ups and sit-ups. like maybe “paddle 5k, then you have x minutes to do 50 mountain climbers, tie 5 crucial knots perfectly, and hang your hammock. you know how brain shit shuts down in times of physical stress. i think that’d be a great way to preserve brain elasticity AND i guarantee your lorchcraft will be on point.
i think if we busted both the land and water ones twice a week til april we would absolutely crush Cumberland or whatever island we wanted. (bearing in mind there’s no way i’m doing anything with 50lbs on my back for the foreseeable)
what say you?
When my grandfather on my mother’s side built the lake, he was helped by the DNR’s technical assistance agent Howard Zeller. He followed every suggestion given by Howard to the letter. They became and remained best friends.
When my mother and my father were dating, they were talking about snakes, and my dad relayed a story about how his cousin had gotten bitten by a baby copperhead at some little piss-ant pond in fulton county and almost died. My mama said the same thing happened to her dad’s best friend and he almost died. I bet you’re putting it together already. Turns out they had actually met years before, when my dad was about 15, and he and my other granddad came with Howard to help seine and transport catfish from the little lake to the big lake. People came from miles and miles around, it was a big event every couple years. Picture it: My one grandfather ass deep in the mud slinging catfish and the other on the bank barking orders; my father ass deep in the same mud and my mama atop her horse watching the whole shitshow with amusement- 10 years before they met and married.
He was bitten at the little lake, right about where we stepped over that little debris dam and I said, “oh yeah, it’s snaky as fuck back here”. So not only is this Pond Life in my blood on my mom’s side, but my dad’s as well.
I did some searching on Howard and found a book he compiled in 1960 and a paper he published in 1989. I ordered the book from a used book dealer but here’s an archived scan of it, and this is the paper.
Other pet projects of Howard’s include High Falls Dam and Lake. I’m sure there’s lots more. Could be a fun research project.
new buddy Jim Ware’s awesome blog. this is the dude that hooked me up with the big rig. he also hipped me to several cool spots we didn’t know about. we ought to hook up with him one weekend, i’ve got a feeling we could learn a lot. check it out.
i mean. damn.
“ladies and gentlemen, for your safety we do ask that you please keep your hands and feet inside the kayak at all times. once again, we’d like to thank you for paddling with Not Getting Ripped Apart By An Aquatic Hellbeast Outfitters”